2018年02月25日 21:14:50|来源:国际在线|编辑:华东医院
For any woman who#39;s tried to have a serious talk with her man, it is an all-too-familiar dilemma.想和你的男人认真谈一次话怎么这么难呢,很多女性都遇到过这个问题。How do you get him to give you his undivided attention?如何能让他认真听你说话呢?The answer, it seems, is simple – wait until he has just sat down to dinner.其实很简单,那就是——等他坐下吃晚饭的时候。A survey of 1,000 men and women found that 8.15pm is the time when men are most prepared to listen to their other halves.一项在1000位男女中进行的调查显示,晚上8点15分是男人最愿意倾听另一半说话的时间。Almost half said they were happy to engage in serious conversation over dinner. This is despite the fact that the women said they were most likely to bring up a tricky topic 12 hours earlier, at 8.20am.调查中,几乎一半的男性说他们乐意在晚餐时间谈论严肃的话题,而女性称,她们习惯在12个小时之前,也就是早上8点20分讨论一些麻烦事。Another good time is in the car – 39 percent of men said they like having a meaningful chat while driving, said the poll by Asda. And if a favour is required, it#39;s best to bring it up in front of the in-laws.还有一个很好的时间就是在车里的时间——Asda的调查显示39%的男人说他们喜欢在开车的时候聊一些正事。如果想要他们答应某事,那最好趁亲戚们在场的时候提出来。More than 20 percent of men said they would give in to their partner#39;s demands if asked in the presence of wider family members.超过20%的男性表示,在其他家庭成员在场的时候,他们更容易答应妻子的要求。Three quarters said they hate being disturbed while they shower.四分之三的男性表示,他们讨厌在洗澡时被打扰。The findings reveal that women struggle most to hold down their spouse#39;s attention while they play games - with a mere 1 percent tuning into what is being said.研究结果显示,女人们最喜欢在男人玩的时候,吵着要丈夫听她讲话,只有1%的女性找对时间。Watching football is another risky strategy, during which 92 percent of men are not prepared to entertain a conversation, opting instead for a quick ‘yes.#39;还有一个冒险的策略是选择男人在看足球比赛的时候说事,92%的男性在这时候都不愿谈话,而选择不假思索地说“好”。The survey highlighted that men prefer to be left in their own company while playing on the Playstation, or watching television.调查强调,男人在玩游戏机和看电视的时候喜欢一个人。More than 80 percent said ‘We need to talk#39; is the most feared conversation opener, while 42 percent of women voted for ‘is everything OK#39; - when their partner knows the opposite is true.超过80%的男性表示“我们需要谈谈”是他们最怕的开场白,而42%的女人都投票给了“你还好吗?”——因为另一半说这话的时候肯定知道一切都不好。 /201505/376225Over the last 30 years, Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana have dressed Madonna, designed costumes for Baz Luhrmann movies and fended off one of the most convoluted tax evasion cases in recent business history.过去30多年里,杜梅尼克·多尔奇(Domenico Dolce)和斯蒂芬诺·加班纳(Stefano Gabbana)为麦当娜(Madonna)提供装,为巴兹·鲁赫曼(Baz Luhrmann)的电影设计戏,并且从近年来商业史上最复杂的逃税案件诉讼中逃脱。Well before same-sex marriage became widely recognized around the world (though not in Italy), the two were openly living together as lovers, unapologetic as they showed up in their tight white T-shirts at gay clubs like the Sound Factory. A recent ad campaign for their fashion line, Dolce amp; Gabbana, seemed to extol group sex.早在同性婚姻在全世界广泛受到认可之前(尽管在意大利尚未得到承认),两人便公然以恋人身份同居,身穿紧身白T恤衫,毫无愧色地在“声音工厂”之类男同性恋俱乐部出双入对。他们的时装品牌杜嘉班纳(Dolce amp; Gabbana)最近的广告宣传似乎又在赞美群交。So it was something of a surprise this week when word broke that the two men, who are no longer romantically involved but still run their business together, had given an interview in the Italian magazine Panorama in which they said they opposed gay people having families of their own.这个星期传来惊人的消息:恋爱关系已经走到尽头,但仍然在一起经营生意的这两位,在接受意大利杂志《帕诺拉玛》(Panorama)采访时称,他们不赞成男同性恋者组成自己的家庭。“You are born to a mother and a father, or at least that’s how it should be,” Mr. Dolce said. “I call children of chemistry, synthetic children. Rented uterus, semen chosen from a catalog.”“人们天生注定是爸爸和妈妈,至少应当如此,”多尔奇说,“我把那种化学手段生出来的孩子称为‘人工合成的孩子’,他们是用租来的子宫,从目录里选出来的精子生出来的。”Outrage was swift.此言引发的愤怒之情迅速蔓延开来。Elton John, who has two children via in-vitro fertilization with his husband, David Furnish, called for a boycott of Dolce amp; Gabbana, a brand he has long worn. Courtney Love declared her intention to burn all the Damp;G clothing she owned. The director Ryan Murphy tweeted that Dolce amp; Gabbana’s clothes are “as ugly as their hate.”埃尔顿·约翰和丈夫大卫·弗内什(David Furnish)拥有两个通过试管婴儿方式生下的孩子,他呼吁抵制杜嘉班纳,这个品牌他已经穿了很久。柯妮·拉芙(Courtney Lve)宣布,她打算烧掉自己所有的杜嘉班纳装。导演瑞安·墨菲(Ryan Murphy)发推特说,杜嘉班纳的装“和他们的憎恨一样丑陋”。Andy Cohen, the host of “Watch What Happens: Live,” said earlier this week that he was auctioning his black Dolce suit on eBay and would donate the money to the Family Equality Council, a gay rights organization. “Even though I loved this suit,” he said in the listing, “it wouldn’t be any fun for me to wear it again.” (By Wednesday afternoon, bidding had reached ,850.)“观察:现场”(Watch What Happens: Live)的主持人安迪·科恩(Andy Cohen)本周早些时候说,他正在eBay上拍卖自己的黑色杜嘉班纳西装,并打算把拍得的款项捐赠给男同性恋权利组织“家庭平等委员会”。“尽管我喜欢那件衣,”他在物品描述中说,“我也不会再乐意穿它了。”(截止周三下午,拍卖额已经达到1850美元)。It was the second time in the last year that members of the fashion and entertainment communities have called for the boycott of a global brand over gay rights issues, the other involving the Dorchester hotels owned by the sultan of Brunei, among them the Beverly Hills Hotel, Le Meurice in Paris and the Principe di Savoia in Milan. Brunei is implementing laws allowing harsh punishment for gay sex and adultery.一年来,这已是时尚与界第二次因为同性恋权利问题而呼吁抵制某个国际品牌了。上一次遭抵制的是文莱苏丹拥有的多切斯特酒店集团(Dorchester),其中包括了贝弗利山庄酒店(Beverly Hills Hotel)、巴黎的默里斯酒店(Le Meurice)和米兰的萨维亚普瑞斯普(Principe di Savoia)酒店。起因是文莱法律严惩同性性行为及通奸。The difference this time, in what seems like a tacit acknowledgment of the power a major advertiser wields in the publishing world: no editor of a fashion magazine contacted for this article would agree to comment or even be interviewed about the proposed boycott, not even Anna Wintour of Vogue, who took a very public stance over the Brunei issue, banning Vogue staff members from staying at those hotels and actively encouraging other Condé Nast executives to do the same.这一次不同的是,大广告商的势力似乎对出版行业产生了心照不宣的影响:本文所联系的时尚杂志主编都不愿意就此发表意见,也不愿就提议中的抵制问题接受采访。《Vogue》杂志的主编安娜·温图尔(Anna Wintour)曾在文莱事件中采取非常鲜明的立场,禁止《Vogue》的员工到多切斯特连锁酒店下榻,还强烈建议康泰纳仕集团(Condé Nast)旗下的其他管理层也这样做,但这一次,就连她也没有开腔。This time, along with Ms. Wintour, Cindi Leive, the editor of Glamour, and Roberta Myers, the editor of Elle, declined to comment, as did the openly gay (and recently married) Ariel Foxman, InStyle’s editor.除了温图尔,《Glamour》的主编辛迪·里弗(Cindi Leive)和《Elle》的主编罗伯塔·米尔斯(Roberta Myers)都拒绝,还有《InStyle》的主编,已公开同性恋身份并且新近结了婚的艾利尔·福克斯曼(Ariel Foxman)。Even Joanna Coles, the normally loquacious editor in chief of Cosmopolitan, was silent Wednesday. (Testy relations with the news media are nothing new for Dolce amp; Gabbana. The designers have banned the fashion critics for The New York Times from their Milan runway shows since 2007, when they were angered by a review of their collections that year.)就连《Cosmopolitan》的主编、一贯多话的乔安娜·科尔斯(Joanna Coles)在星期三也缄口不语(杜嘉班纳与新闻媒体关系向来不佳。2007年该品牌的米兰时装秀后,两位设计师看到《纽约时报》关于杜嘉班纳的一则后大为光火,从此便禁止《纽约时报》的时尚家出席他们在米兰的秀)。And while Madonna declined to comment, associates of the singer seemed to be making subtle attempts this week to distance her from the designers, noting that her relationship with Mr. Dolce and Mr. Gabbana has been contentious over the years. The message: Lots of people have issues with them.麦当娜也拒绝,这个星期,她的助手们似乎在小心翼翼地做出努力,强调她与多尔奇和加班纳的关系多年来争吵不断,把她与这两位设计师的距离拉开。说起来,倒是很多人都看他们不顺眼。For their part, Mr. Dolce and Mr. Gabbana issued an apology, of sorts, that did little to mollify their critics.在多尔奇和加班纳方面,他们发表了某种程度上的道歉,但并没有缓解对他们的批评。“We firmly believe in democracy and the fundamental principle of freedom of expression that upholds it,” Mr. Dolce said in a statement delivered by his spokesman, Paolo Cigognini, who declined further comment. “We talked about our way of seeing reality, but it was never our intention to judge other people’s choices.”“我们坚决相信民主,以及自由表达这一民主的基本原则,”多尔奇通过发言人保罗·西格格尼尼(Paolo Cigognini)说,“我们说出了我们对真相的看法,但我们无意评判他人的选择。”西格格尼尼拒绝发表进一步。(On his Instagram page, Mr. Gabbana called Elton John a “fascist” and posted images of a Je Suis Charlie-style campaign, titled appropriately “Je Suis Damp;G.”)(加班纳在自己的Instagram页面上说埃尔顿·约翰是“法西斯”,还贴了“我是查理”式的宣传画,标题是“我是杜嘉班纳”。)Italian fashion is largely a dynastic industry, but unlike Miuccia Prada, Donatella Versace or Angela Missoni, Mr. Dolce and Mr. Gabbana, who met in the early 1980s, do not come from money.意大利时尚界以家族传承居多,但与缪西娅·普拉达(Miuccia Prada)、多娜泰拉·范思哲(Donatella Versace)和安吉拉·米索尼(Angela Missoni)不同,相遇于80年代初的多尔奇和加班纳并非出身富庶的家庭。Mr. Dolce grew up in Sicily. His father, according to a 2005 New Yorker profile, was a tailor and his mother sold fabric and clothing at a local emporium.多尔奇在西西里长大,根据2005年《纽约客》上的一则人物特写,他的父亲是个裁缝,母亲在当地百货商场里卖布匹和衣。Mr. Gabbana is taller, flashier, perennially tan and rides around Milan, his hometown, on a leopard-print motorino. His father worked in a printing factory and his mother worked for a laundry service.加班纳身材更高、穿着更花哨,皮肤常年晒成古铜色,经常骑着带豹纹的托车在家乡米兰一带飙车。他的父亲在印刷厂工作,母亲在一个洗衣房里工作。The two began their business in 1985 and by the early 1990s, Madonna was wearing their clothes everywhere. She was the ideal spokeswoman for the two designers, who both rebelled against Roman Catholicism and yet revered its iconography.1985年,两人成立了自己的公司,90年代初,麦当娜开始穿他们设计的装到处亮相。她反抗罗马天主教,但仍尊敬它的图像,可以说是两位设计师的理想代言人。And like her, Dolce amp; Gabbana promulgated an image of excess but in real life were workhorses.和她一样,杜嘉班纳也宣扬一种表面有些放肆,但在现实生活中,却非常耐用的形象。“You’d go into the stores and see all the studs and the bells and whistles in the front, but in the back there were surprisingly wearable clothes,” said the writer William Norwich, who worked for Vogue in the early 1990s.“你到店里去,表面上看到那些铆钉和各种花哨的装饰,但令人惊讶的是,它们其实是非常具有穿戴性的衣,”90年代初,为《Vogue》撰稿的威廉·诺威克(William Norwich)写道。The clothing business in the ed States never became enormous, but by 2005, their company employed about 2,000 people.美国的装业从来就没有大过,但早在2005年,他们的公司就雇佣了约2000人。They started a fragrance business, Mr. Gabbana appeared on reality shows and the two men even recorded a cover version of the Andrea True Connection’s 1976 disco classic, “More, More, More.” Which is just what they did. In 2003, according to The New Yorker, they sold more products in Italy than Gucci, Prada, Armani and Versace.他们开始进军香水产业,加班纳开始在真人秀上亮相,两人甚至翻唱了Andrea True Connection在1976年推出的迪斯科经典名曲《更多,更多,更多》(More, More, More)。他们就是这样我行我素。根据《纽约客》报道,2003年,他们的产品在意大利的销量超过了古驰、普拉达、阿玛尼和范思哲。Around this time, Dolce amp; Gabbana stopped being a pair — at least a romantic one. But in interviews, Mr. Gabbana talked openly about wanting children and made it clear he wasn’t referring to adoption.就在这前后,多尔奇和加班纳分手了,但依旧是事业搭档。在许多访谈中,加班纳都公开谈起要孩子的事,还强调说自己不想收养孩子。Instead, the two spent the next several years fighting charges of tax evasion. They were convicted in 2013 and given a 20-month suspended sentence, only to have that reversed and the conviction vacated by Italy’s highest court in October 2014.两人接下来的几年时间里,都在与逃税指控做斗争。2013年,他们被判有罪,获得20个月的缓刑期,2014年10月,意大利最高法院改判两人无罪。This February, they showed their latest collection in Milan. It drew heavily on that iconography and paid homage to mothers. Some of the models came down the runway holding babies. Others wore sweaters that said “I love you, Mama.”今年2月,他们在米兰展示了最新系列。它大量使用肖像,表现出对母亲的敬意。有些模特抱着婴儿走上秀台,还有些人穿的套头衫上写有“我爱你,妈妈”字样。Shortly thereafter came the Panorama interview, where the designers expressed apparent opposition to gay families.不久后就有了《帕诺拉玛》的访谈,两位设计师表达了对男同性恋家庭的鲜明反对。“They’re alienating a large portion of the customer base,” said Ed Filipowski, the president of KCD, one of the fashion industry’s largest public relations firms. “They’re alienating women or anyone trying to have a child in vitro and they’re alienating their L.G.B.T. constituency. It’s a serious issue.” (He added that he found Elton John’s comments on the matter commendable.)“他们这样做等于是放弃了很大一部分客户,”KCD公司总裁艾德·菲利波夫斯基(Ed Filipowski)说,KCD是时尚界最大的公关公司之一。“他们这样等于放弃了希望通过试管婴儿方式要孩子的女人以及所有人,放弃了自身的LGBT人群基础。这是个很严重的问题。”(他还补充说,埃尔顿·约翰对这件事的回应是值得称颂的)。In what may turn out to be a P.R. problem in Hollywood, Dolce has long been a favorite on the red carpet. In 2011, Scarlett Johansson was decked out in a fitted lavender dress with a floral pattern. A year later, Selena Gomez showed up to the Vanity Fair in a gray sleeveless dress.在引发好莱坞公关问题之前,多尔奇一直都是红毯宠儿。2011年,斯嘉丽·约翰松(Scarlett Johansson)穿了杜嘉班纳一件合身的淡紫色带花朵图案长裙。一年后,赛琳娜·戈麦斯(Selena Gomez)身穿一件灰色无袖长裙在《名利场》(Vanity Fair)上亮相。Terrence Howard wore a Dolce tuxedo to the Kodak Theater this year. In the auditorium, he sat near Ms. Wintour, whose daughter, Bee Shaffer, arrived wearing a Dolce gown. (Also wearing Dolce at the Oscars: David Oyelowo and Channing Tatum.)今年,特伦斯·霍华德(Terrence Howard)穿了一件多尔奇的晚礼,在柯达剧场亮相。入场后,他坐在温图尔身边,温图尔的女儿碧夏弗(Bee Shaffer)也穿了多尔奇的长袍。在奥斯卡颁奖礼上,大卫·奥伊罗(David Oyelowo)和查宁·塔图姆(Channing Tatum)都穿了多尔奇的装。Now, all these people risk getting an earful from gay rights organizations and their publicists.现在,这些人都面临遭到同性恋权力组织和他们的宣传人员斥责的可能性。“We have our annual Media Awards Saturday night,” said Sarah Kate Ellis, the president of Glaad, the gay rights organization. “We have a lot of people coming and we’re telling all of them that we would appreciate it if they not wear Dolce amp; Gabbana.”“我们有年度媒体奖周六夜颁奖仪式,”同性恋权利组织Glaad协会主席莎拉·凯特·埃里斯(Sarah Kate Ellis)说。“会有很多人出席,我们会告诉所有人,如果他们不穿杜嘉班纳,我们将表示感谢。”Simon Halls, a founding partner of the entertainment public relations firm Slate PR, said: “I don’t think this is going to go away. I think people are really going to take them to task for this.”西蒙·霍尔斯(Simon Halls)是公关公司Slate PR的创始人之一,他说:“我不觉得这事会马上过去。我觉得人们会谴责他们。”“These are families they’re talking about,” said Mr. Halls, who himself is an in-vitro fertilization parent along with his husband, the actor Matt Bomer. “These are children. Everybody’s got their own personal issues. Those guys are allowed as people to have their own opinions. But they also are public figures and when they communicate that kind of hate filled speech, they are firing up other like minded people in the most irresponsible way possible. It’s dangerous and despicable.”“他们的话涉及家庭,”霍尔说,他自己也和丈夫、演员马特·波莫(Matt Bomer)采取试管婴儿方式剩下孩子。“还涉及孩子。所有人都面临着个人的问题。他们当然可以像普通人一样有自己的看法。但他们也是公众人物,当他们说出那种充满仇恨的话语时,就等于在以最不负责任的方式煽动那些和他们有类似看法的人。这是很危险,也很卑鄙。”Some of the anger appeared to go beyond gay rights.针对他们的愤怒超出了维护男同性恋权利的范畴。Lynn Hirschberg, the editor at large at W Magazine, suggested that the designers’ heavy-handed behavior in the past was part of the reason the reaction has been so harsh.《W杂志》(W Magazine)的特约编辑琳恩·赫舍伯格(Lynn Hirschberg)认为,两位设计师过去那些拙劣的行为也令这次人们对他们的反应格外严厉。“They’ve been unkind and difficult for many, many years, and people have been waiting to respond,” she said. “This is an all debts must be paid kind of thing.”“很多年来,他们一直为人冷酷,不好相处,人们一直都在等机会反击,”她说,“就像是恶有恶报。” /201503/366169

It#39;s the ;Dirty Harry; version of tech support. A Colorado Springs man was hit with a municipal violation after he ended a long-running battle with an uncooperative computer by blasting it eight times with a handgun Monday, police said.维修版《肮脏的哈里》日前在现实中上演。据警方透露,20日,科罗拉多州斯普林斯一名男子跟自己的电脑较劲了很久,还是没能修好它,一怒之下用手朝它连开8,因此违反了市政法规。Lucas Hinch, 37, was given a violation for discharging a weapon inside city limits, police said in a report titled, ;Man Kills His Computer.;当地警方在标题为“男子杀死电脑”的声明中表示,现年37岁的卢卡斯·辛驰违规在市区范围内使用武器。The police report said that Hinch ;was fed up with fighting his computer for the last several months; and shot it in a back alley behind his home just before 7 p.m., ;effectively disabling it.;警方声明称,辛驰过去几个月一直在跟他的电脑作斗争,他简直受够了,于是在晚上快到7点的时候,在家后面的小巷里朝电脑开,“将它打得稀烂”。Police public information officer Lt. Catherine Buckley said he shot the old Dell desktop machine with a Hi-Point 9 mm pistol.警方负责公共信息的长官凯瑟琳·巴克利中尉称,男子击这台老款戴尔台式机时,用的是半自动9毫米口径手。;He did tell us he thought it was okay because we are an open carry state,; Buckley said. But it is illegal in the city limits to discharge a firearm unless one is protecting life or property, she said. The violation would most likely result in a fine, Buckley said.巴克利称,“他告诉我们,他以为在本州公开佩是合法的。”但在本市范围内开是违法的,除非当事人是为了保护人身或财产安全,她说。巴克利透露,辛驰很有可能因他的不当行为而被罚款。The police department posted a photo of the blasted machine on its Twitter and Facebook pages.警方在其推特和脸书主页上贴出了被打烂的电脑的照片。 /201504/371601

Do you always go for the wrong men, but have the most perfect pet? Then this relationship advice may be for you。你是不是一直选错男人却拥有着一只最完美的宠物?那么这个恋爱建议可能就是为你准备的。 A leading love expert has suggested there are parallels between picking the perfect partner and the way you choose your dog。一个前沿爱情专家表示,选择一个完美伴侣的方式和你选方式有很多相似之处。Author and relationship coach Dr Annie Kaszina Ph.D - who is the first to admit she has her own chequered relationship history - discovered that by applying these principles she could finally make the right choices。作家兼恋爱教练安妮·卡斯楠士是第一个承认自己有过糟糕爱情史的相关专家。她发现通过运用这些原则,她终于可以做出正确的选择了。When Annie met Orlandino it was love at first sight: the big brown eyes, the irresistible looks, the knack he had of making her laugh。安妮与奥兰蒂诺相遇的时候可谓是一见钟情:大大的棕色眼睛,魅力十足的长相,有让她呵呵大笑的本领。But sadly, he wasn#39;t a keeper. Beneath that charming exterior lay some unsavoury habits and a difficult and a very demanding personality. Orlandino was the dog from hell。但遗憾的是,他不值得她与之厮守。在他那迷人的外表下隐藏着一些令人讨厌的习惯和令人难以相处,很强势的性格。奥兰蒂诺就像一只地狱犬。What Annie learned from that encounter set her on the path to becoming a women#39;s relationship coach。安妮在那次恋爱经历中吸取的教训让她走上了成为一名女性恋爱专家的道路。She learned her lesson, chose her second dog - and her current lovely partner - with a lot more care, and has since taught hundreds of women simple ways to spot the right man for them, using her pet as the template。她吸取了教训,更加谨慎小心地给自己挑了第二只,也就是她现在的情人。从此以后她把自己的宠物作为范例,教给了几百位女性简单找到她们另一半的方法。Now Annie shares ten of her tips with Femail ers, inspired by her new book, entitled Do You Choose Your Dog More Carefully Than Your Husband?, which comes out on Valentine#39;s Day。现在安妮把她在新书《你在选时比你在选丈夫时更仔细吗?》中所体会的10个小窍门分享给Femail栏目读者。这本书将在情人节发行。1. Temperament is king性格是最重要的Mean, moody, and magnificent may sound exciting… So, too, may the idea of taking on a challenge, or #39;taming#39; someone #39;wild#39;。吝啬,情绪化,气宇轩昂等性格特征可能听起来让人很兴奋。让人想要接受挑战,驯“野兽”。Unfortunately, they lead to hard work relationships; and hard work relationships lead to emotional exhaustion and breakdown。不幸的是,这会导致艰难的恋爱关系;艰难的恋爱关系会导致情感衰竭以及精神崩溃。Better to look for someone sunny and sweet-natured。最好是找个阳光的,脾气好的。Think about the way a date projects himself on first meeting and beyond. Why would pessimism or negativity be an aphrodisiac?想想看约会对象在第一次见面和之后的日子里举手投足的方式。一个悲观消极,充满负能量的人怎么会催发你的情欲呢?2. Check the pedigree查一查家庭背景Obviously, this is simpler with dogs than it is with people, and can#39;t be settled on a first date. But then Rome wasn#39;t built in a day, and nor should relationships be。通常而言,挑人不像挑那么简单,可以第一次见面就下决定。但是罗马不是一天建成的,恋爱关系也不是。You can listen to the way they talk about parents, family members, and friends。你可以听听他们讨论父母,家庭成员,和朋友的方式。If they come across as Billy-no-mates, there is cause for concern。如果他们恰巧没什么朋友,那你就要引起注意了。3. Beware yappiness让自己开心Unless you#39;re okay with saddling yourself with Mr I#39;m Great, Mr Alpha Male, Mr In Love With The Sound of His Own Voice, or Mr Life and Soul of the Party, be careful of over-talkers。除非你愿意和自大,大男子主义,自吹自恋,派对霸王这样的男人在一起,不然就要当心那些自吹自擂的人了。Incessant talking on a first date may be a sign of nerves, but also a lack of interest in the other person and a lack of social skills。第一次约会就很话唠可能是紧张的表现,但也是对对方缺乏兴趣和交际能力差的表现。They need to take an interest in you too (This holds just as true for Strong, Silent Types)。他们也要对你感兴趣(这同样对闷骚型的男人也适用。)Asking non-intrusive questions is not rocket science。问一些不具有侵犯性的问题不是个复杂的事情。4. Good manners有礼貌This goes without saying. But it#39;s not limited to table manners。这是不言而喻的。但也不止于餐桌礼仪。Snarliness towards waiters, children, and anyone outside the charmed circle of you and your date is a bad sign of things to come。对务员,孩子和任何其他在你俩二人世界之外的人纠缠不清是个不好的现象。Selective good manners actually suggest that those manners are not deeply ingrained and may soon melt away。过于讲究好礼貌事实上表明了这些礼貌并不是根深蒂固的,可能很快就没有了。5. Over-exuberance精力过度旺盛Pushy does not mean keen. It means pushy。强势并不意味着他特别喜欢你,强势就是强势。First date pushiness is the sign of someone who doesn#39;t respect boundaries and will end up pushing you into emotional corners。第一次约会就表现的咄咄逼人意味着他并不尊重彼此的界限,结果会把你推向情感的死角。6. Good behavior举止得体Many a woman who has overlooked a little first date leering - at other women - has lived to rue the day。很多女人忽视了第一次约会对其他女性抛媚眼的重要性,之后都悔不当初。You have standards for how you would dress and behave on a first date. Your date should, too。你有第一次约会自己穿衣和举止得体的标准。你的约会对象也应该有这样的标准。If your date#39;s behaviour violates your standards in any way that#39;s a clear sign that you could be in for a rough ride。如果你的约会对象的举止违反了你的标准,不论怎样那就很明显意味着你之后的约会会举步维艰。7. Docility温顺You want your date to be sensitive and responsive to your wishes。你想让你的约会变得和你所想的一样心思细密,符合你的心愿。Choosing your meal for you, unasked, or making decisions for you without consulting you is a clear sign of wanting to be top dog。没有问你,就为你选好了食物;没有问你,就为你做好了决定,这些都很明显表现出他想主导这个约会。Do you want to be reduced to playing Bottom Dog?你想被逼到只能当败犬吗?8. Playfulness活泼快乐You want someone not just to have fun with, but someone who#39;s fun to be around。你想要的不仅仅是一个能够一起愉快的玩耍的人,更应该是一个能让你在他身边感到快乐的人。That doesn#39;t necessarily mean someone who acts like a kid - what long-term kids are actually looking for is second mummies. You want someone who you feel comfortable enough around to be silly with。这并不一定意味着某人表现的很像个孩子,那些长不大的“孩子”想要的是第二个妈妈。你想要一个让你感觉很舒的人,和他在一起又感觉傻乎乎的。9. Beware rogue breeders小心流氓的饲养员If you#39;ve been single for a while, friends may take it upon themselves to set you up with #39;lovely dates#39;。如果你长时间单身,你的朋友们就会担负起帮你制造约会的的责任。Just because they find that date #39;lovely#39; in the context in which they know them doesn#39;t mean you will。他们从他们自身来观察,觉得这场约会将会十分美好,但这并不意味着你也会感同身受。You wouldn#39;t buy a house just on the say-so of Mrs Bloggs three doors down。你不会因为某人的三言两语就去买个房子。You always have to do your own due diligence。你必须要做好你自己应做的准备。10. Leave the paperwork at home把纸上谈兵抛之脑后Women are terrible at playing #39;Fantasy Future#39; - they go on a first date and, provided the man isn#39;t an obvious freak or psychopathic monster, they get busy imagining their future life with that person。女人幻想未来的能力很差。她们在第一次约会就幻想着她们和那个人的未来生活,假设这个男人不是个怪胎或心理变态。A first date is not designed to be a marriage contract. It#39;s simply the start of getting to know another person。第一次约会并以一定会通向一场婚礼。而只是了解一个人的开始。If you find yourself fantasising about that happy future, take a cold shower, or speak to a grounded friend。如果你发现自己在幻想美好的未来,那就去洗个冷水澡,或者找个讲道理的好朋友谈谈。 /201507/386185

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